HOBART 9: the GAMES ISSUE

HOBART has just posted it's table of contents for their special games issue # 9. I can't fucking wait for this thing to come out... just to look at it, smell it, rub it on my face.. ok ok, I know... I seen Joe Wenderoth's name on there and went all Letter's to Wendy's.

That LTW's link is to a twenty-two minute recording of Wenderoth reading LTW's. It's from Salon.com. Download the fucker. Thank me later.

In addition to the print issue, they will also be featuring a corresponding online component similar to ones they've done in the past, sort of a virtual "DVD" bonus features, which includes: alternate endings, author interviews, sketches, etc.

Table of Contents

Stories
E.P. Chiew
Kim Chinquee
Bryan Furuness
Barry Graham (me, I know)
Stefan Kiesbye
Dave Madden
Mary Miller
Grant Perry
Jennifer Pieroni
Brandi Wells
Joe Wenderoth

Personal Essays
Mike Alber
Matt Bell

Comics
Jeffrey Brown
Lilli Carre

Roundtable Discussion
Ryan Boudinot
Jeffrey Brown
Paul LaFarge
John Roderick
conducted by: Matthew Simmons


ORDER this bitch... NOW

NO COLONY / WIGLEAF

NO COLONY just released its contributor's list which includes many DOGZPLOT contributors and friends, including:

Matt Bell
Jimmy Chen
Kim Chinquee
Shane Jones
Sam Pink
JA Tyler
Brandi Wells.

There are other people in their too, great people, people worth reading. NO COLONY, read it, love it, embrace it, reread it again when you are cold and lonely and thinking of me.

WIGLEAF...... is back. "It's pretty fucking sweet, huh?" - Cartman

NEW STORIES from DOGZPLOT folks

Check out some new stuff on the web from DOGZPLOT contributors and friends:

Matthew Savoca
Pequin
DRIPS ARE EVERYTHING

Lauren Becker
Word Riot
CHEMISTRY

Anne Germanacos
Word Riot
SUNDERING TWINS

JR Pearson
Word Riot
TWO POEMS

DOGZPLOT FLASH FICTION ANTHOLOGY - order now

DOGZPLOT FLASH FICTION ANTHOLOGY 2008

"I go to Dogzplot to find out who put the demon in the vestibule, the atom bomb in the kitchen. We need these stories now more than ever."
– Kyle Minor, author In the Devil's Territory

It's finally at the printer. It should be ready to pick up very very soon. I can't wait to see this mothafucka in print.

It is a beautifully bound 5.5 by 8.5 paperback. The cover was designed by Jordan C. Brun.

A few of the contributors include:

Claudia Smith
Matt Bell
Kim Chinquee
Stefan Kiesbye
Elizabeth Ellen
Scott Garson
Chad Simpson
Aaron Burch
Dawn Corrigan
CL Bledsoe
Yu-Han Chao
Simon A. Smith

and so many more bad ass writers that I can't even list em all here.

Complete info, including PAYPAL ordering info is here.

There's also a PAYPAL link right over there on the right side of the blog --------->

Keep doing what you're doing and god bless.

DR. SEUSS - FOX IN SOCKS...SIR

I can't blab such blibber blubber.

My tongue isn't made of rubber.

Mr. Know.

Now come now.

Come now.

You don't have to be so dumb now...

Try to say this,

Mr. Knox please...

Through three cheese trees

three free fleas flew.

While these fleas flew,

freezy breeze blew.

Freezy breeze made

these three trees freeze.

Freezy trees made

these trees' cheese freeze.

That's what made these

three free fleas sneeze.

Stop it! Stop it!

That's enough, sir.

I can't say such silly stuff, sir.

I miss Dr. Seuss. I'm going to the library and checking out all his books and reading them until I pass out. And then when I wake up, I'm going to write a masterpiece.

DAVE SEDARIS on LETTERMAN

Watched Dave Sedaris on Letterman tonight. I expected him to be more clever, funnier, I expected the stuff he read to make my insides feel gooey...... I'm not a fan.

SAM PINK - ADVICE

DOGZPLOT is running an amazing list of practical ADVICE from SAM PINK in the Fall 08 issue. Both Sam and I invite you to visit his BLOG and contribute your own piece of ADVICE. I will then choose my favorites to add to the Fall issue along with Sam's piece. Here are a few pieces of ADVICE.

15.
When putting a razor blade on someone's bagel, for god's sake, cover the razor blade with cream-cheese other wise they'll notice and you'll fail once again in cleansing the earth of your enemies.

24.
Whenever you get a haircut, and someone says, "oh hey, you got a haircut" you should affect a somewhat confused look, then slowly reach your hands up to your head and feel around, and then say "oh my god, how did this happen?" and then become increasingly more terrified and start screaming and keep yelling "oh my god, fuck, how did this happen, it must've happened while I was sleeping oh god oh god oh god." That will most likely keep them from stating things that are obvious.

27.
The best way to get rid of someone you hate is to call them over to use your slip and slide, and before they come over you dig a really big hole at the end of the slip and slide and line the bottom of the hole with knives. Then cover the hole with leaves and be like, "oh no, you go first, I insist". Then when they get ready to go, shoot them in the back of the head and uh, I don't know, figure out something to do with that big hole you dug, because that could hurt someone.

ELIMAE - drew kalbach, kim chinquee, ja tyler

Please check out the July issue of elimae. It is stuffed full with amazing writing, but feel free to start with these stories by DOGZPLOT contributors and friends:

Drew Kalbach
night before the move

Kim Chinquee
card
they'd get uniforms
superhero
pepsi and milk

JA Tyler
well

Howie Good
the extruded plastic liturgy

PLEASE HELP - donate to good cause

Hello loyal DOGZPLOT contributors, friends, readers, writers, and all else. I need your help. Please take the time and stop by this site and donate to a good cause. Please. Whatever you can. CLICK HERE.

Anyone who donates will receive a free copy of the DOGZPLOT FLASH FICTION anthology 2008 and a copy of Drew Kalbach's chapbook, The Zen of Chainsaws and Enormous Clippers.

Keep doing what you're doing and god bless.

PETER SCHWARTZ - artwork

Please check out PETER SCHWARTZ's latest artwork, THE DEATH OF LUXURY. It is the current cover design for CRIT Journal's V. 2, I. 4 - 2008.

JOHN BIANDO - the nimble few

Please check out John Biando's poem, Teachings From the Church of Karnov, in the latest issue of The Nimble Few.

He also has a few in the archives:

Great Levels of Connection
"The chocolate irrigated us," thought Marilyn

COOKIE TREE PRESS - EASTERN MICHIGAN UNIVERSITY

The folks at Eastern Michigan University are now accepting fiction and poetry manuscript submissions.

Here's the info from the publisher:

"COOKIETREEPRESS plans to publish 2-3 amazing books of high quality literary fiction and poetry, annually. We won't describe in a few words here what amazing means to us, so long as you understand we know it when we read it. We like description. We like voice. We like great storytelling. We like taking risks. We like edge, but don’t fall off the side of it. Go ahead and blow our doors off." www.cookietreepress.org


GUIDELINES

SUSURRUS MAGAZINE - peter schwartz

"The Guitar Blade"

Check out this interview in SUSURRUS MAGAZINE, featuring DOGZPLOT's art editor, PETER SCHWARTZ.

My favorite part of the interview:

SM: Can you tell us a little bit about your creative process?

PS: Actually I can't.

That's brilliant.

THE ZEN OF CHAINSAWS AND ENORMOUS CLIPPERS - drew kalbach

Drew Kalbach's The Zen of Chainsaws and Enormous Clippers, will be the first release in the ACHILLES CHAPBOOK SERIES.

From the author:

"it's full of poems about your mother. i think it may border on copyright infringement. mel gibson said he hates it more than the jews. several children read the manuscript, but they started crying. one of my friends had an epileptic seizure reading it. my mother threatened to disown me if i go through with getting it published. one poem, if read backwards, will summon satan from the underworld. it is full of coded child pornography messages and websites. there is a full color glossy photo of me naked wrapped in a mink fur coat in the very middle. it will cost ten dollars plus a pint of blood, and the blood will go to my private blood collection. new zealand already banned it, and it was burned in idaho twice. my dad says it's the best thing ever, he said he is very proud of me, then he cried and divorced my mother. people say the first three poems are cursed. people have claimed to see the ghost of hitler after reading it. it is a tribute to the ninja turtles disguised as a marilyn manson song disguised as real poetry. it is so deep and layered that you can't read it, you must climb through it. there is no depth, i wrote it all in a word document in 24 hours, it's meaningless, just random words from television commercials strung together. it is actually sponsored by kellog's cereal and by trojan condoms. most people laugh when they read it but really i intended for them to say hmmm and have a very thoughtful and faroff look on their face. my girlfriend wrote two of the poems, she isn't really my girlfriend, he is actually a blind border collie, she is a dog. the last poem is about beastiality and bill clinton, not in that order. it is endorsed by ron jeremy."

Excerpt from Monotone:

"The year starts and ends in winter. It's inaccurate to say our relationship is based on temperature, but lack of warmth is a huge aspect. Nothing changes our respect for vanity plates and porcelain mugs with racecar drivers in profile. Every day we walk up three steps and slip on the fourth, but take it as a good omen. When the snow starts in December, it's the staircase again, but in rain boots and carrying long black umbrellas. Hand gestures float across the dinner table like sign language in an attempt to convey mute sarcasm."

More info coming soon...

5 STAR LITERARY REVIEW - featuring DOGZPLOT

Check out TJ Forrester's 5 STAR LITERARY REVIEW. In the past he has featured such journals as: Storyglossia, Zoetrope: All Story Extra, Hobart, Smokelong Quarterly, and others. This week it's DOGZPLOT's turn. I chose to feature a story from Angela's Birthday issue 2008, FISTFUL, by Elizabeth Ellen.

Here's an excerpt from FISTFUL:

"I turned over, got up on my hands and knees. There was a mirror on the headboard. As he fucked me I stared into it, stared at my black eye and the asshole who’d given it to me. His face was puffy and red, his black hair matted and drenched in sweat. He didn’t look much like the boy I’d fallen in love with. He looked like one of my mom’s asshole ex-boyfriends, one of the ones who beat her and told her she had a spoiled, little bitch for a kid. I didn’t look much like myself either. My stomach was elongated and swollen, my tits veiny, the areolas that centered them darkened and textured. I looked like something out of a goddamn National Geographic magazine; like a strung out, pregnant Courtney Love smoking a cigarette in the pages of Vanity Fair."

Here's an excerpt from my review:

"We are more interested in good storytelling than precision, than fancy words and metaphors and concepts that sound real pretty but don’t necessarily inform the reader. We like subtle, seemingly simplistic writing that blows your fucking head apart when you take the time to excavate below the surface. We like to dig in and get dirty."

CELLA'S ROUND TRIP

"A Hybrid Type Literary & Visionary Journal for the Good of Creative Humankind"

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE check out the debut issue of CELLA'S ROUND TRIP. The web design is amazing, the kind of design that leaves me feeling completely inadequate. The issue itself is gorgeous, the graphics, the art work, the writing, the obvious amount of TLC that was put into bringing this journal to life. Thank you to Rachel Hartley-Smith and all the other dedicated folks at Ball State for putting this thing together.

Go take a peek at what's inside

A few DOGZPLOT contributors and friends even found their way in, including CL BLEDSOE and PETER SCHWARTZ. There's even a few words from myself:

"2008 in online literary publishing seems like the 2003 World Series of Poker where an amateur player took first place and $1.5 million after earning his seat into the tournament (cost for a seat is $10,000) by winning an online poker tournament that only cost him $40. After that, Texas Hold’em poker exploded. It’s on at least three TV stations on any given day of the week, and any old knucklehead with access to a home computer can play and possibly win a million bucks. The number of WSOP contestants continues to rise every year. When will the bubble pop? I have no idea. Thus with online publishing, dot-coms, blogs, whatever the medium, anybody with access to a home computer can write something and stick it online, taking the gamble, hoping for the payoff, whatever that means to them. New online zines, journals, blogs go up almost every week and likewise, I have no idea when the bubble will pop and how it all will end, or transform rather. I’m not a trendsetter. I simply reshape existing trends to fit my own personal likes and dislikes and hope people dig what I’m doing."

Thanks again CELLA'S ROUND TRIP for an extraordinary debut issue. Can't wait for #2.

PRICK OF THE SPINDLE - ravi mangla, anne germanacos

Please check out the latest offerings from DOGZPLOT contributors and friends Ravi Mangla and Anne Germanacos in the latest issue of Prick of the Spindle. And while you're there please take the time to scroll through the archives. I really like what Cynthia Reeser is doing with this journal.

Ravi Mangla
HOW TO BE A BAD ASS (JUNIOR EDITION)

Anne Germanacos
HIS MOTHER'S CATS

While you're there please check out some great stuff from other DOGZPLOT folks:

Amandine Williams-Abraham
WILD ANIMAL KINGDOM

Corey Mesler
I NEED A LITTLE POEM
MY FATHER IS A FRANGIBLE GOD
WRITING MY ANGEL

Kristine Ong Muslim
FEAR BOX
VERSION 9; BREAKFAST

Jimmy Chen
THE UNREALISTIC PHILOSOPHER

Ray Succre
HOARDING THE BRAIN

Jamie Jones
MAY DAY
UNSCREWED

Barry Graham
TOOTHBRUSH
THE NATIONAL VIRGINITY PLEDGE

HANK & TUPAC

BOB, or MAN on BOAT - peter markus

BOB, or MAN on BOAT

"Markus has a remarkable ability to strip life down to its basics, to the point where the metaphors we manufacture as the looking-glass for our existence end up standing in for existence itself. Fish, mud, night and river come to stand in place of family connections as fathers and sons, by giving themselves to fishing, give themselves over to a lone search and to loss.”
—Brian Evenson

“Peter Markus, who wrote of brotherhood with rare wisdom and purity of style in the linked stories of The Singing Fish, now trains his extraordinary powers on the heartaching relationship between fathers and sons with even more enchanting results. Bob, or Man on Boat is a marvel of thrillingly limpid prose—a profound and unforgettable first novel.”
—Gary Lutz

Order info from DZANC

ACHILLES CHAPBOOK SERIES

Do you have a flash fiction or short story chapbook manuscript, 26-48 pages in length?

Check out:

ACHILLES CHAPBOOK SERIES

We are looking for writers seeking immortality through words, who breathe fire, who wish for "no man to forget how menacing we are. We are lions." - Achilles

JUNE 2008 aka MATT BELL month

Congrats to DOGZPLOT contributor and friend MATT BELL.

In addition to his story, Creating a Radio, appearing in elimae, Matt has recently published another amazing piece, The Folk Singer Dreams of Time Machines, with an accompanying interview (from Kelly Spitzer), in the latest issue of SmokeLong Quarterly 21. Both of these stories come from his forthcoming novel. This book is gonna blow your fucking head apart. It's that great.

Here's a quickie from the TFSDOTM:

"When he closes his eyes at night, everything he sees is dynamite and mustard gas and time machines he wants to build for saving little girls lost in foreign wars. He wants to write music to gather these people up and keep them safe. Songs like bomb shelters, like air raid drills, like preparations for tragedies."

I also want to mention (not that you don't already know) that this is SmokeLong's 5th anniversary issue and features work from so many amazing writers that I can't even list them all here. Congrats to SmokeLong for five years of outstanding literature.

And finally, check out the storySouth Million Writers Award top 10. Included among those ten finalists is Matt's story from Storyglossia, Alex Trebek Never Eats Fried Chicken. Congrats to all the finalists, now do your part and get your asses over there and vote.

DOGZPLOT FOLKS in ELIMAE

Check out the latest offerings from a few DOGZPLOT contributors and friends in the latest issue of elimae.

Barry Graham
Thumb's-Up-Seven-Up
http://www.elimae.com/2008/June/Thumb.html

Matt Bell
Creating a Radio
http://www.elimae.com/2008/June/Radio.html

Greg Gerke
The Coming of the Steppe Peoples
http://www.elimae.com/2008/June/Steppe.html

Sean Ruane
Tonic
http://www.elimae.com/2008/June/Tonic.html

Brandi Wells
Six Thirteen Sixteen - Three Fictions
http://www.elimae.com/2008/June/Wells.html